Being a Young Parent

Having a child doesn't mean you have to stop acting like one.

There are misunderstandings when it comes to being an adult with responsibilities. Rumors go that once you get married and settle down you're life will cease to exist and your child's life will rule over yours. That is anything but true. As a parent your responsibility is to not to teach your child to be an adult, but rather to be a child. My husband and I are both in our early 20's and if you saw us on an average day without our daughter there is a large possibility that you would assume we were simply dating.

Our interaction with the average "adult" would play out something like this:
After examining us they would assume we were just out of high school, and MAYBE just past 20. After seeing me they would more likely place me in the high school age range.

A few moments might go by....you'd ask about school. Do we attend? Yes. Do we work? Yes. Are we planning our future? That is a great question.
Why yes, we are planning for our future. However, our future in your eyes is bound to be at least 5-10 years from now.

"Our future in our eyes began 2 years ago"

They would smile and agree and be impressed by the ambition we were showing in regards to planning for the future.

Wait for it.

...............................................................

"We have to think about our daughter's future too"

   .......Slight pause ....unsure reaction....

"Oh, how wonderful"  they say with the fail attempt at hiding their true feelings by masking them with a massive smile and insecure positive words. 

Being a young parent in the eyes of our community is being a kid parent. The community unfortunately see's you as a kid with a kid. Therefore they feel they have every right to raise you and your child alike, because you are not ready yet. Ready does not mean how experienced you might have been, or how many years you have worked with children, whether you have a job, whether you are working towards a career or have a career.

If you are or look under the age of 24 you are a kid. 

This is what's called Harsh Reality.

"Neo waking up"-The Matrix

Now comes a first person perspective to what seems negative. 

At California academy of science of an admission free Wednesday.

Being a kid with a kid can be quite successful. We have been parents for 3 years counting my pregnancy. My husband and I both work at jobs, attend school, work at our marriage, and raise our daughter. Although the average adult  might decide that young parents are not doing enough; they are outrageous. Not only do we have to accept the same responsibilities as the average parents; we normally go above and beyond. We take our children to the park and interact with them. On occasion we take our friends child along and even then we play with our kids. Being so young there is a good chance we don't have a car or have no gas for our car. Then comes the part where we must WALK everywhere. We walk back with both arms with grocery bags, while pushing the stroller with your child in it, and theres usually more groceries in the basket underneath. Why don't we have a car or money you say?

                          

 Rather than start life with running start we began life with a broken foot. -Shane Halbert

As young parents may not be able to afford daycare or drive each day somewhere new, but we can afford to play with our kids. I love going to thrift stores and getting her $1 interactive toys that I know WE will love to play with. Having a child is essentially having a younger sibling except you can't just hand her over when she cries. The annoyance of our child crying becomes immune to our senses after the first 6months. After that you are able to tell whether they are actually hurt, need something, or they are just needy in general. 

The great thing about our community during this time is even though our economy is "bad" our views as a community are becoming frugal. We are all willing to live with less and enjoy the simple things in life. As a young parent this is a plus because more and more available free events are open to take our children.

Support your local young parent. A pat on the back and a "good job kid" is sometimes more than enough to get us through the day. On the other hand, if you are reading this and you know that you have sent out positive support to a young parent one way or another:         Thank you 

                                                                                                              We all started our futures early. We all chose to do so. I think in the 21st century everyone is fully aware that every young parent you see could have chosen to not go through with bearing a child. But they did. Please have some respect for young parents. We try very hard and go through enough battles with ourselves to have unnecessary odd stares and comments thrown at us. We love being young parent's. However, do not expect us to just throw away being young because we have a child. We would not ask of that for you. Let us play sports, go dancing, and just be crazy sometimes without giving us disappointed looks. We deserve it. Hell, ask us to watch your kids and we will just so you can go have fun too! We will more than likely say yes :)

No matter what age you are you will always be a child at heart. Be a child with your child and remember what it was like to love, play, and have fun. 

Here are some links to frugal fun in Rohnert Park and Santa Rosa!


Rohnert Park Farmer's market
ChuckECheese
3rd Street Cinema-$3.00 movies
Drive in movies hosted by BrainFreeze!
$.99 waffle cone Wednesdays at TCBY

Please feel free to comment with more ideas and I will add them!